Please note: This has been written with an intent to ‘get it out’ rather than keep it and re-edit it over and over and over. Some parts might not read as well as a well thought out blog post.
*takes a deep breath*
The Slinky Minx needs to change. It has to, or the business will crumble completely.
You see, business here at little ol’ Slinky Minx, hasn’t been a bed of roses lately, if at all for that matter. I’ve had my moments of hair pulling and head hitting the desk (many of those) or hand to forehead. Hours upon hours, of me questioning what I’m doing, why I’m doing it, and in general WTF!
I’ve made lists, many, many lists, of things I need to do to help promotion, I’ve called on bloggers for advice, and paid them, and sent products to be reviewed. I know I need to make videos! I need to set up a blog! I need to do Instagram videos! I need to do a podcast! I need to do more. But I can’t do it the way things are.
I’ve come to the conclusion I need money to survive and to do any of the above, I need to feel safe, and the truth is I haven’t. Safe to write, safe to be seen, safe to know money is coming in, safe that my home won’t be taken away…I’ve needed the basics folks and I just haven’t had it.
The strain has taken its toll.
I’m simply fighting too many battles at once. Some invisible, some are social or financial, and many are just deeply embedded in me.
- Fear of failure vs fear of success.
- Fear of being seen vs wanting to be out and proud and sticking it to the ‘man’.
- Applying for retail spaces and being turned down as ‘they don’t want a shop like mine in there’.
- Being an inclusive business and fighting against the norms and perceptions of what a sex shop ‘should’ be like.
- Being a small business and fighting the big ones (this is mostly a google thing).
- Fighting the numerous looks of ‘ewww’ and disgust when I’m lucky enough to be able to have a stall and promote my business
- The lack of places to promote my business – FB and Instagram (here in Australia they’re the two most used SM platforms). This always makes angry, actually, a better word is furious. I can’t even promote safer sex because it’s seen as ‘pornographic’ AHHHHHHH!
- Fighting society in general when it comes to sex positivity, sex education, and offering a ‘different’ approach to pleasure.
- Financially struggling to keep my home, pay bills and keep TSM up and running.
- Battling time restraints as being given a ‘day-job’, while money burdens have been eased, now takes up my time.
- Then there’s my personal struggle with depression and anxiety
Just to name a few.
So what’s the solution? Close TSM? Sell TSM? Become less inclusive and give in to social norms to keep going? Give in and admit defeat?
NO! That just isn’t me. I’ve worked hard on creating TSM to just throw it away.
I will not let social norms, and people’s inability to accept ‘different’. Nor shall I allow society’s dislike of sex, the unique or bright colour to take away my fire. I won’t let social media platforms and their refusal to allow me to promote bring me down. They’ve contributed to that enough and I’m saying NO! It stops here. I’m saying FU to the many business helpers (electronic – banks included) which always say no we don’t do dealings with businesses of ‘that’ nature. FU!
So what’s going to happen I hear you ask.
Well, I’m giving it a good tweak. It won’t be the same, but it will allow me to continue my business and will still hold all the values that matter to me.
I know retail is where I want to be. I know I want my own bricks and mortar shop. I’ve wanted it ever since I was a little girl playing with my cash register and charging people to play with my toys. I want to support hand produced and artists. I want to be inclusive, support sex positivity, body positivity, feminist, LGBTQIA+ and environmental movements. These are as important to me as breathing. I do it in my personal life, and I wish it to overflow into my business life, it usually does, so why fight that too?
Unfortunately, the thing which stops promotion, stops me being able to rent a space, stops advertising on social media, stops me from attending many markets, is that I sell dildos, vibrators, packers. Take them out of the equation and promotion etc wouldn’t be a problem. Strap on harness, not a problem, team it with a non-phallic fleuro orange dildo and the stop signs are turned on. Ridiculous!
By removing sex toys and the label ‘sex shop’ I can become a gift shop and fill it with all things not dissimilar to items here….minus the sex toys. More feminist, rainbow pride, art, colourful jewellery. My vision isn’t coming across very well, but trust me, it’s fab! Not to mention making things less problematic for me. I’ll also be able to have after pay services, be with a regular bank that doesn’t charge astronomical fees and use a variety of other services which up to now have nor been accessible as I sell ‘adult’ content.
One can only fight for so long before they break. And I’d rather change things now before I’m broken, than wait before I am.
I won’t lie. It’s a bummer I having to remove sex toys because I think bringing toys which weren’t available here in Australia was an amazing idea. But there are shops now beginning to spread their support artisan brands and the brands I sell have slooowly become available in a few shops here. So all is not lost my lovelies. ANd that’s not to say I’ll venture back into, I just need to take a little break and enter the market a little differently.
I guess the next question is, when will this happen? Well, since I only had this brainwave an hour ago, it will take a little while to work things out. BUT! there is a big butt here. ALL in stock sex toys are now 50% off! In fact, anything your order that’s in stock is 50% off. I need them to go to good homes, and not be lonely in the stock room. If you’ve been after a New York Toy Collective, Godemiche, Holepunch Toys, or any of in-stock products Vibrator, Dildo, Harness, Gift Card, Lubricant, Packer, now is your time to grab a bargain! Use this code ‘feelinghappy‘ at the checkout and 50% off will be removed. There are no further discounts with postage.
I don’t know if this is a good change, but I can only try.
See you on the other side!